How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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