i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
