are you still at the devil's house?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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