just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
