I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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