she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
