somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
