I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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