He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
bring money and cleavage
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Of course I have a pirate flag
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
