GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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