The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
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