where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
