"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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