Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
