the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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