just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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