wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize