also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
