He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
