its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
