i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
