So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize