Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart

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(845): View more from New York

I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.

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(801): View more from Utah

She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.

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(432): View more from Texas

So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.

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(831): View more from California

She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs

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(314): View more from Missouri

I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.

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(317): View more from Indiana

So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..

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