i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
