i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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