Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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