i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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