im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
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