No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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