You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I want her autograph on my taint
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
