How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Randomize
