But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
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