don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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