Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
