youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
