yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
