once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
