Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
