It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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