JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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