oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
