the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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