but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
