Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
