Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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