We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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