I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
