My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Randomize
