i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
