Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
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