We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize