absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
